Friendship

Whenever I felt cold and angry

Your words were there to warm and soothe

Irrespective of how long it took

You found your way to help me heal.

A rare connection in opposites

An unimaginable variance in characters

But to bind stronger was our hearts’ cry

As so it did grow with each passing day.

A fondness of a little while

Which made days feel like years

Not years of the swiftness of time

But years of unimaginable understanding.

Possession of a strong will for happiness

It every day continued to nurture

Even in every noticeable absence

An impulse was felt like it was so close.

Always to please was never a concern

For it flowed with utmost ease

Lessons taught not by words in person

But understanding gained through actions.

All those made me sit and wonder

What true friendship was really made of

But among the words in speech and on paper

Its complexity could not be fathomed.

Yours Truly,

OluwaTos!n.

Waiting For Something Great

In our bid to  do something out of the ordinary we tend to forget about the little things that matter most to us, sometimes without us even realizing. I always wonder what my tomorrow will feel like but I’ve learned a great lesson (you could call it truth):

“Savour the moments that make up your  everyday life and try to make the most of them.”

Things might not always turn out the way we want but we should be thankful still. There’s something a friend of mine always says,

“In our bid for perfection, we become even more perfect than we ought to be.”

We walk and talk and eat and breathe forgetting that there is someone out there hoping to live our kind of life. Being grateful and thankful are therefore the perfect pair of what we can do while we wait to get something great or while we wait to become someone great. A point to remember, however,

“Greatness is a thing of the heart of love.”

Enjoy that conversation with your mum, or that moment with your friend, or that time you spend on that unending queue, or even that moment when you do not know what next to do; for in the midst of chaos, opportunities are birthed. And like a wise man said,

“We have opportunities around us everyday of our lives. Some of us just remain blinded to see it.”

So my word is, don’t miss that opportunity to smile at someone having a bad day, or help someone who doesn’t have something you have enough of. You never know what might happen in a couple of weeks. The person you are kind to  just might be the key to what you have been hoping for. Keep your eyes open to opportunities today.

Yours truly,

OluwaTos!n

Hopes for our Fatherland

I was studying when i came across somethings i suppose we all need to know. I do not suppose. I know.

“An eye for an eye makes the world go blind”
-Mahatma Gandhi

Everywhere I’ve been to in recent days has been saturated with the fuel subsidy removal issue. What else do I expect, right? But I mean in class, my lecturer asked a question and no one could answer. All for someone to say it was all beause of the fuel subsidy issue. What on earth did that have to do with it?! Glad he didn’t get mad about the response. I never thought I’d have a reason to discuss this but right now I don’t think I have an option.

I’m glad about the idea of the non-violent protest but do people really understand what that means. Some people honestly dont even know the meaning of the word subsidy itself. All they are aware of is that the fuel price has incresed. I’m not on the side of the government but I just wish we could all take out time to educate those around us who are clueless about the true meaning of subsidy in it’s actual sense.

When this happens I think we will then be able to reason like a true set of wise people who would not trigger any formof violence regardless of the fact that the country’s armed forces are “ready for us”. All we need is a governmnt that will be transparent enough with it’s citizens. I end with this, also by Mahatma Gandhi,

“When I despair, I remember that all through history the way of truth and love has always won. There have been tyrants and murderers and for a time they seemed invincible, but in the end, they always fall.”

We can all believe and hope for the best and try as much as possible to enlighten people on the true meaning of a non-violent protest if we are truly concerned about the lives of our fellow Nigerians. God bless Nigeria.

-With Love,

OluwaTos!n

Uniqueness in Randomness

“So much of life, it seems to me, is determined by pure randomness”
– Sidney Poitier

Randomness is not so much about doing something without any particular purpose, meaning or pattern because eventually, your randomness is different from mine and that is what makes us all unique. I used to think that life was formed out of pure randomness with no particular thing I was meant to do. When I was much younger I wanted to become an actress because I could do a good act in front of my mirror every day. I wanted to become an artist because I could draw. I wanted to become a doctor- but that changed as quickly as I grew up! I wanted to become a news caster because I could speak well. I wanted to become an architect because they imagined beautiful structures. I wanted to be a talk show host because I love Oprah and what she does! I thought I could be most of all that in my short life.
I came to realize, however, that since I have just one life, I could learn from those who were already all I wanted to be. It became so stressful at a point just trying to keep up. But I loved it and that was what kept me going. There was, however, something I was missing out. I forgot all about the randomness of things happening around me. The family and friends I have, the people that live around me, my roommate, my classmates, my lecturers, the lady who I always greet down my street even the guy that walks past me when I walk down the road. Many random things you might think, but they are all in my life for a reason.
So much goes on around us and it’s amazing how we could learn from experiences, events and people if only we paid attention to our so called ‘randomness’. I decided to then start with my family. There’s a lot to say about them for they have all taught me so much without them even knowing. For these reasons I realized that there was actually a real depth to every “I LOVE YOU” that I’ve ever said. Something about them made me love them. Something about them made me care about them. Something about them made me crave spending moments with them that I’d cherish forever.
I love my dad because he has taught me to be responsible, to love God and have an absolute and loyal trust in God- it is in a bogus term called FAITH. He has made me realize that God’s blessings are not so much about what we can do but who God is and what He can do. I love my mum because she teaches me to love people and be kind to them no matter what. She has taught me to always be patient, to care for others and pay attention to them and not just myself. She has taught me to always believe and hope for the best. She has taught me to always talk to God AND hear what he has to say to me from His word because that is the complete cycle of prayer.
I love my first sister because she has taught me to be determined and to not give in to pain or criticism. She has taught me that once you are completely convinced about something you should go after it and give yourself to it with all your heart. She has also taught me that love is the most beautiful thing in the world. She has taught me to create targets for myself and go after it to completion. She has taught me that you should expect the best always and never let anyone or anything make you look away from your target. She has taught me to think because ideas, once ignited, would work wonders in our lives and other’s.
I love my second sister because she has taught me that silence is golden; speak only when you need to. She has taught me to save and to always be content with what I have. She has taught me that having a great company of friends is priceless because it’s like you have your own little family away from home. She has also made me realize that God works best for us and does unimaginable things when we are at peace and hope in Him for the best.
My brother…hmm…the sweetest! He has taught me to play and to not take myself way too seriously even if I’m serious about important things. He has taught me to love (his wife will enjoy!). He has taught me that if you are interested in something, you can know all there was to know about it- talk about knowing football and footballers inside-out! (Not like they are sharing their pay with him oh!). He has taught me to be imaginative and to create in my mind things that’d make me smile. Most of all he has taught me to enjoy the company of children no matter how old I am. He has made me realize that spending time with them makes you let go of worries that drain the rest of world. He has taught me that excitement about something brings the best out of it.
There are a whole lot of things to say about what I learnt from the girl that sat next to me in class today, the girl who rolled her eyes at me on Tuesday, the guy that sold me a snack yesterday (he says his name is ‘Spontaneous’! ). The bottom line is: We all need to embrace the randomness and uniqueness about the randomness around us. It’s the randomness that nature has given to us that makes each and every one of us unique in our own special way. Embrace your own randomness and have a beautiful year ahead and remember that everyone in your life is there for one reason or another.
With Love,
OluwaTos!n

With All My Love

Something totally strange happened to me today! I know it might not seem as weird, to you, as it seemed to me though…MY DAD TOLD ME HE LOVED ME! when I least expected it-at noon. I hadn’t done anything ‘sweet’ sides making him breakfast every morning. Ok #StoryOfMyLife, I know. Anyway, this got me thinking was he thinking of dying or what?!!! I didn’t even want to think about it. After a couple of seconds I realized that I could take it easy when I remembered the verse where God says, “With long life will I satisfy you.” So we could say I’m not at all worried.

I now kept thinking to myself. What if I died in the nearest future? (remember that I wasn’t scared-honestly- I was thinking as usual). I thought of the places I want to visit, the things I want to do (including sky diving, which my dad told me to go ahead and do after he was long dead, say the next 40+ years. *rme*. I’d be too old for that then…sorry. I digress a lot), the people I want to meet, the people I hope to show how much I really love, Nigeria that needs me,…and every other single thing that passes this brain of mine (glad I love imagining things. It helps to ease a lot!).

Anyway, I thought of an entire universe of things and I really just realized that I ought to show more love. Yeah, yeah, we’ve all heard that before. I know. But then, we still get sad when we don’t get what we want, when people upset us, when people break our hearts. Mehn, life is too short for nonsense!

If you are heartbroken it’s best to fall in love all over again, because even though one’s heart feels like it has shrunk to the size of a mustard seed, Jesus says there’s still hope for you. If you lost a loved one (or the person was kidnapped), you could relive the good moments (better for you if you keep a journal).And if you know that heaven is sure for you, you might very well just hope to die now so that you don’t mess up anything (but then we know that even Jesus knew that death wasn’t friendly–Ref. Luke 22:41-44)

With that said, I just hope that with the rest of the year 2011 that we have, we could do wonderful things for those we love, forgive those who have hurt us, love ourselves even more (and not do stupid things that could ruin our lives) and probably even get to know those we do not know too well a lot better (I was thinking of making home-made cookies for my neighbours and maybe ‘DHL-ing’ Christmas gifts to my sisters 🙂 ). Well those were my thoughts. Only, my cash is in d bank because ‘holiday-time’ is ‘dad’s-wallet’ time for me! I know I should end this with compliments of the season yeah (we decorated the Christmas tree today *dancing*) but since I havn’t started writing Christmas stuff I’d allow you add that in your head…so peace, love and a universe of joy to forever keep you aglow!

–With all my love,

OluwaTos!n

The Sun In Her Highest Glory

Moments pass and I wonder why things happen the way they do

Events I hope to forget because of the hurts and pain.

Looking back daily wishing I could change the past

Oh, how futile my persistent journey of no end.

I wonder if the skies ever hold any answers for me

So I look up to count the stars and see how full the moon is each night.

Morning after morning I awake to see the sunrise

Evening after evening I hurry to sit to watch the sun set.

On that Sunday evening when I sat and watched

Peering through my light pink tinted lenses.

I felt a warmth lightly over my right arm

And I knew it couldn’t have been the sun.

I turned to look to my right

Wondering who my guest might be.

Looking straight into your eyes

Yet speaking not a word.

You said you watched me daily

As I performed my pre-sunset rituals

Crossing my legs in place holding a bottle in my right hand

With my bracelets hanging loosely on my wrist

Still I said nothing hoping you would get the message

The sun now a beautiful semi circle falling behind the field.

Or so to me it seemed for there was nothing else

That caught my attention except your bright brown eyes.

Yesterday you finally found the courage to ask me

Why I always came out to see the sunset.

You seemed puzzled as I saw in your eyes

After I said I woke up to see the sunrise daily.

No one else might do the same on earth

And that was what made me special.

It was what my dad taught me to see

Prior to the time he returned to dust.

He told me of how much grace the sun had

How she shone on both the good and the bad.

He taught me that even as bright as she may be

She had a time when she will let the moon reflect her light.

For she has her own time to rule during the day

But still yet allows the moon to glory at night.

He reminded me that no matter how great I am at something

It’s best to give others a hand for the world to receive my light when I’m gone.

 Nothing else in nature’s beauty had any eyes beheld

That held so much beauty and grandeur.

Nothing else made me grateful for my existence

For I’m certain that I am more beautiful than the sun in her highest glory.

Isn’t it?

Isn’t it common sense

To increase in knowledge

So that you can better yourself

And improve your world?

Isn’t it common sense

To do something differently

When you try it daily

And it produces nothing good?

Isn’t it common sense

To plan your day wisely

So that no single second

Slips through your fingers?

Isn’t it common sense

To dream big everyday

Because it may turn out real

Plus you lose nothing from dreaming?

Isn’t it common sense

To wake up in the morning

And be grateful for life

That was given you freely?

Isn’t it common sense

To make a budget

On every income or allowance

And stick to it without fail?

Isn’t it common sense

To love just because

It feels good and is commanded

Even though it’s not reciprocated?

Isn’t it common sense

To let go of past hurts

And painful memories

That will forever be unchanged?

Isn’t it common sense

To hope for the best

For when things and people fail

Hope itself never fails us?

Isn’t it common sense

To believe in yourself

And discipline yourself

Until you master it?

Isn’t it common sense

To discover your gift

And bless the world

With that special you?

Isn’t it common sense

To make right choices

So that you never look back

In anger, pain and regret?

Isn’t it common sense

To make the most of time

For it’s given to us all equally

But can never be bought or transferred?

Isn’t it common sense

To realize that each second

Not spent in love

Can never be gotten back?

Isn’t it common sense

To make mental or written notes

On what you want to do on the internet

Before going online at all?

Isn’t it common sense

To know that each hour

In your day may be

Dedicated to twenty-four things?

Isn’t it common sense

To learn from those ahead of you

Who have done things right

And have proofs to show for it?

Isn’t it common sense 

To choose to do the right thing

For choice and time

Are the only free things we have?

Isn’t it common sense

To give everything you do

Your very best shot

For you’d spend time doing it anyway?

Isn’t it common sense

To love God with all you are and have

So that He can be good to you

And show you his unmatched love?

Is it common sense

To call it common

When we know what to do

And yet do not do it?

Talk is cheap

We all have this habit, attitude, time-waster or even friend that we wish we could drop but don’t know how to get around putting aside. I’m not going to give some ‘10 direct steps to breaking a habit’ or something of the like because that’ll just bring you back to the same spot- and it probably will leave you worse off with guilt.Most of us would have read in the beatitudes “Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth.” You might think you know that but have you ever really tried to weigh those words? We might know someone to be proud or we may even know ourselves to be (even if we may hate to admit it). Knowing, however, isn’t going to help!
Meekness is being teachable. Being ever ready to learn, unlearn and relearn. How many of us can really do that?…Permit me to say, all of us can! It may seem shocking or you may even try to see some truth in it. You are completely allowed to your own opinion.Being meek allows you to have an open mind to other people’s opinions. Allowing you seek advice even from people who may not be as talented as you but have an edge somehow, somewhere, in something. Being meek means having a teachable spirit. This can be seen in successful people all around. They are readers of quality books and always want to learn newer ways of doing things. They want to be a step ahead of other person.
Will, mind you, won’t do the trick because most of all those unwanted things, which cluster around who we want to be, didn’t develop in a day! It’s therefore the most unrealistic idea to think that they could varnish in one sweep.
You need to be ready to rise and fall. You need to be willing to allow time work on you for real. You need to know that it’s going to be tough, rough, painful and scary. You must be ready to practise some things- and it takes time. You require the hard work of removal and replacement.


It is often said that, “Over time, a slow, steady stream of water will erode the hardest rock and turn giant boulders into pebbles.”
One thing I always say, “I have a choice.” But you can’t just choose to change because your choice to change is not in itself sufficient. It depends on the subsequent choices you make, no matter how little- from how long you sleep to the time you get out of bed.
Talk is cheap. Change is expensive. It costs all we have and that’s our time -our life time. And until you are ready to sacrifice your time, nothing good- or not many good things- will come your way. This, is my way of saying; wake up as a person, wake up as a nation because everything you do as an individual affects what we do as a nation. God bless Nigeria. God bless you.
Happy birthday Nigeria!!!

This Guy was after my life!

He told me he just couldn’t let me go for anything and he really, really loved me. I was shocked to my feet why any sane person would say he loved me just like that –worse off, in the midst of my mid-teenage-life-crisis. This was honestly the last thing on my mind. I felt that was awkward. He must have been crazy of some sort but that isn’t even where the fun began!…

He always walked with me everywhere I went either to grab something to eat or to even look for another guy. You name it. And whenever I went somewhere that he couldn’t get through to, he’ll just keep a close watch on me. I called him a crazy stalker. I would never have even told my friends about him but he was around me, everywhere. And so they eventually found out. They asked me about him each time and I kept saying, “He’s just some person I met some time ago” always trying to avoid the question.
I thought eventually that this was getting too close for comfort and he was making me uncomfortable. How could he be trailing me like this?! I had to find the courage even from the last pint of my blood to tell him to stay away! I tried but I just always had this horrible feeling that I was going to hurt his feelings. So weeks passed and I said nothing to him about this. I honestly have no reason why I was being sentimental. I honestly had none.
He’d give me gifts and send me pretty long letters- ALL TYPED IN SIZE 8 FONTS! I knew then and there that he was out of his mind! Why would he type them and go through the stress of printing them? You might be thinking that he must have been such a coward. And he definitely must have had a lot of time on his hands. I thought that he needed to get a life! Each morning he saw me, he asked what I thought about the letter sent to me the previous day. I go “yhu sae what?!”- In my head though. But it’s like he knew me so much that always knew whenever I honestly tried but stopped at the third line. “Could he read my mind?” I thought.
I couldn’t keep living my life like this! He took all the classes I took…you may be thinking classic pervert. But I was just speechless. My thoughts froze. How could I then have even said a word? He was probably just after my life and maybe he’ll take it the moment I spoke my mind to him. This thought now made me scared about all I was doing. I now started reading the letters at least so he’ll have a reason to spare my life. Day 1 came and I slept off after the first I think ten or twelve lines. Day 2 came and all the activities I engaged in just didn’t help. So I just went to bed.
When the letters grew to the size of a big book, I finally found the guts. It was taking up space on my table. I said something. He told me then that he couldn’t force me to do anything. By now I was surer than the sun that he was obviously after my life!
One of the notes that he sent through his friend, John read and I quote, “You may ask me for anything in my name and I will do it.” (John 1414). Also He told me through the letter that He sent through Isaiah, “For your sake, I will not keep silent…I will not remain quiet, till your righteousness shines out like the dawn, your salvation like a blazing torch” (Isaiah 621). Another said “Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, I will lift up; and every branch that bears fruit I prune, that it may bear more fruit” (John 152). Yet another that shocked me was that He was here with me yet He said “Behold, I am coming soon! Blessed is the who keeps the words of the prophecy in This Book…My Reward is with Me, and I will give to everyone according to what he has done” (Revelations (227+12). But he then told me, “Mind you sweetheart, it’s not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit” (Zechariah 46).
He told me that I could do nothing on my own and that was why he was always beside me helping me and making all things- even my mistakes- work out for my good. I stood speechless. He told me that trying on my own to read those letters would be like reading chemistry in kindergarten. He was driving home a point.
 He told me the secret to reading those long letters. He said I had to love him. “But loving You on my own isn’t at all easy”, I said, because I had so many things running through my mind and going on in my life. Then he asked me a sincere question, “Sweetheart?” ,and I said “yeah?”, “Do you make out time to eat every day?” Of course I did! So I just nodded. He then said, “Then, it shouldn’t be a big deal to make out time for me. Moreover your spirit will starve to death eventually if you didn’t!”
He went further to say, “if you read my word out of fear of what might happen if you didn’t, then you wouldn’t be made perfect in love- in My love. And good things happen to those who know the love that God has for them.” He told me that all I needed to do was to believe right and it would help me do right and that his grace is sufficient for me. This was the most soothing thing I had heard in a long time. Suffice to say He told me that faith was nothing more than seeing Jesus. And I remembered Jesus. And then He said…”I am He.”
Would I have poured perfume on His feet if I had Known? He knew what I was thinking and He said “You can only be righteous and obedient by faith. Even when you blow it, which you definitely will. Just remind yourself that you are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. And the more you say that, the more it gets into your subconscious and you’ll effortlessly live a holy life- but only in me.” I was speechless because I had never heard a thing like it in my life! He then broke the silence and said, “Would you like me to take you shopping because I give you so many things even when you don’t ask?” …What else would have been my answer? Of course I said YES! He could have my life over and over if all I needed to do was to talk and boast to everyone about how much he loved me, without me even having to do anything to get it…plus I could explore the world and shop in its most expensive stores! 
What more could a girl ask for 😀
(THIS IS AN OLD WRITE UP FROM MY PREVIOUS BLOG)

Can I truly say “no regrets”…?

It’s amazing how life could turn things around. I was more than shocked when I found out about someone who could by now have been a friend. He tried being my friend but I was embarrassed to be his friend. Everyone thought he was a freak. I also did but never voiced it out and I really didn’t know why. I think there was a part of me that cared and wanted to be friends too, but I didn’t want to be given a name like they gave to others.

It was a warm afternoon as usual in my beloved Nigeria (that I still hope would change for good). We were done having lunch on this day that I deemed bittersweet. It was Tuesday when we ate spaghetti ( I’m not much of a pasta fan it’s funny how come I love indomie noodles). I hated the early afternoons on Tuesdays but I loved the later part because I got to go swimming  after lunch with a host of my mates and a friend, Reni. Let’s call her Reni.

I loved how I looked in my new swimsuit. It was an electric blue piece with a green zip detail. It was what i always wanted. The next thing i wanted to do, at that point, was to get in the water and splash! I took my special time doing the pre-swimming rituals, walked towards the pool felling as new as my swimsuit. I got in and there was this feeling I had-it was awkward in a funny way. I felt eyes on me. Was someone actually staring? I thought. I didn’t want to make a swift 180 degree turn, so i tried to act like i was looking for someone. I was blushing on the inside, hoping it wouldn’t show on my face.

Who was i kidding? my face lit up like a bulb! it was like there was truly electricity running through my veins. I finally made a 30 degree turn. and then another 45 degree probably and…oh well, do the math! I finally made it to 180 but I didn’t make it to my dream ‘starer’. I was now the awkward one, it was no longer my feelings. I tried to swim out as fast as a mermaid but I definitely didn’t do a great job. Then the ice-breaker came-he smiled at me. I was in for this, unquestionably. “Are you stupid or what? smile back! ” I heard my head say. So I smiled back. Now I wasnt sure if that took a decade or a split second. I just smiled and then said “Hi”. He moved as I moved.

He was the awkward guy from school but I never said a word about him. I thought it was OK to say hi because I hated people teasing him. I choked on words that couldn’t even find their way out. I swam to another spot but he followed me. He then said, “I need help. I’m not the best swimmer…could you assist me?” what! I didn’t even know how to swim well enough to even get off the eyes of my trainer-our trainer!and here you are asking me for help! And you could guess what i did. I laughed. I hated that I laughed but I couldn’t do any other thing. I could, but I didn’t know what. i thought he’d just leave. I felt bad for what I did but I could not reverse or change the moment.  “I might as well just move on” I thought to myself. I thought that was the end of it. I avoided him everyday on the walk ways and every other route I knew he passed, for an entire week. You might think, “wow you’ve got a lot of time on your hands.” I couldn’t face him. I just couldn’t.

The next Tuesday came and it was time to swim. He walked up to me this time  and said “Hi”. I wasn’t embarrassed but I acted like I didn’t want him looking at me. I said hi back and walked away. He asked me the same question he did the previous Tuesday. I was scared of being his friend. I was scared of being a friend of someone like ‘that’. Left to people at that time, he was a type to be far away from. I hated it but I went along with everyone’s idea even though I didn’t like it.

It’s funny, after some six years since I last saw him, that he’s now a top blogger,presenter, soon to be host, who is now doing advertisements and chasing his degree (that’s the best part for me about him!) at the same time… and here I am just running after my degree doing nothing at all. It was said in one of his published interviews that he was abused when he was much younger. Reasons for the way he seemed I guess. He was just effeminate in his childhood/formative years.

Suffice to say he is straighter than a ruler!…No regrets though. Some people come and some people leave. It’s just best to be well prepared for life-time opportunities. The life I live is as unique to me as my smile plus I’d still have to defend it afterwards! I just feel this is a wake up call to make the most of whatever life deals you. But sadly I also wish I was there for him during his ordeals.  Cheers to a new school (and life) session!